Thursday, October 20, 2016

Youth and Adults Must Work Together to Stop Violence

By Dr. Stephanie E. Myers, National Co-Chair, Black Women for Positive Change 

Click here for more blog posts from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.  

Last year, during the 2015 Week of Non-Violence, Black Women for Positive Change (BW4PC), asked youth what they thought were some of the causes of violence affecting their communities. We wanted to get their firsthand opinions about the pathways that lead to physical violence, domestic violence, gang violence and one-on-one confrontations. We wanted to know why they get into fights, gangs and confrontations. 
 
To facilitate our discussion, we convened a “Youth Speak: We Listen: Town Hall Meeting,” in Pittsburgh, PA., in collaboration with Pittsburgh Police Chief Cameron McLay; BW4PC Pittsburgh Chair Diane Powell; Pittsburgh City Councilwoman Natalia Rudiak. A diverse group of 125+, mostly African American high school and college age youth, ages 14-24, joined the discussion in the auditorium at Allegheny Community College, in Pittsburgh. Other invited participants were elected officials, faith leaders, parents, teachers and law enforcement officials. 
 
Our opening question was, “What do you think are the causes of violence in your school, community or family?” We expected answers of police abuse, poverty, bad housing, bad schools, etc. Instead, the youth responded, “The adults in our lives! Many of the adults in our lives are negative and their negatively leads us to create violence against our classmates, siblings and in our communities!” Some of their examples were:
  • Adults don’t like their spouses”;
  • Adults don’t like their neighbors”;
  • Adults are unemployed, or don’t like their jobs”
I was very surprised to hear the answer from the youth that the adults in their lives are the problems, that contribute to violence. I expected them to say it was their peers, or gangs or police. But, when I consider the U.S. divorce rate of 46% the youth may not be far off…I guess the statistics show that many adults don’t get along with spouses. And, when you consider the impact of gentrification in U.S. cities where whites are moving into predominately Black neighborhoods and don’t speak or interact with the residents who were there before they got there, this can create anger. Plus, the export of millions of U.S. jobs overseas has left many Black American adults unemployed and underemployed and this can lead them to express anger, depression and job dissatisfaction. 
 
As we listened to the youth complain, we noticed that most of them were well groomed, well dressed and articulate so, it appeared that their parents were around and caring for them.  And, while I admit some parents are negative, I must speak up for millions of hard-working parents and adults who try to give their children and youth, the best they can.  However, it cannot be denied that the students at our Town Hall meeting felt the negative attitudes of adults in their lives contributed to violence. They felt the adults put lots of pressure on them and this caused them to be short-tempered, and get into random fights. 
 
In order to address a perceived problem of negativity, youth and adults must take responsibility for walking down the pathways that lead to trouble. Neither group can blame the other for all of the bad decisions that are leading to violence. Consider the following:
We adults must look in the mirror and recognize the negative impacts we have on youth from divorces, lack of employment, lack of money and interpersonal conflicts. Yes, those behaviors probably do create environments that foster youth anger and violence…and the price is too high.  On the other hand, youth who bully classmates, drop out of school, get arrested for shop-lifting and burglaries and become gang bangers, can’t expect the adults in their lives to stand by and watch them self-destruct. 
 
If today's youth and adults want to live in neighborhoods of peace and prosperity they must work together. Adults and youth need to sit down and explain how they are feeling and the challenges they are facing.  It’s up to all of us to “Change the Culture of Violence” and it starts with each individual. If adults and youth work together in families, churches, schools, neighborhoods and with law enforcement, the violence can be stopped.

STEPHANIE E. MYERS, Founder and National Co-Chair of Black Women for Positive Change, is Vice President of the R.J. Myers Publishing and Consulting Company (RJMPUB), a minority-owned small business in the District of Columbia that provides management consulting and capacity-building services for local government agencies, Historically Black Colleges and Universities, and national non-profit organizations. She is co-producer of www.urbanhealthcast.com, a website dedicated to webc,asting minority health lectures, workshops and conferences.  Dr. Myers spearheaded the Week of Nonviolence.


Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Organizing for the Week of Nonviolence in Atlanta

William Kellibrew
Click here for more blog posts from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016

The Black Women for Positive Change Atlanta, Georgia Week of Nonviolence focused on bringing awareness to violence prevention. Community members joined together to discuss the impact of violence and identify strategies for supporting a violence-free community.

The goal of the event was to support nonviolence and violence prevention in the Atlanta community.

We held the event at the Adamsville Recreation Center in Atlanta, Georgia. Two moms who have experienced their sons killed, as well as community members, were involved. 12 people attended.

Difficulties we experienced included finding a location, collaborating with local organizations, finding funding, and advertising the event without a huge network.

Having a co-chair was extremely beneficial.

Quality was more important than quantity at this event. Two mothers provided a glimpse into their experiences of losing their sons to violence. The conversation was extremely beneficial and the discussion about violence-prevention provided some relief to attendees and enabled us to look at solutions. It seems like there is commitment to continue next year’s event. 

Next year, we will start organizing earlier and utilize social media to share information about the event.   
 
On July 2, 1984, at age 10, William Kellibrew witnessed the murders of his mother, Jacqueline and 12-year-old-brother, Anthony, by his mom’s ex-boyfriend in their family living room.  The killer took his own life that day, but not before making William beg for his life at gunpoint.  Kellibrew struggled as a child, teen and young adult, but persevered to become a global leader on the issues he faced in his years of struggle including child sexual abuse, witnessing and experiencing violence and homicide as well as a multitude of victimizations and long-lasting effects related to trauma. 

Now, a global advocate for human, civil, children and victims’ rights, Kellibrew travels throughout the world sharing his story of courage and resiliency on the pathway to healing and on-going recovery.  

In 2011, Kellibrew was recognized by the White House as a ‘Champion of Change’ working to end domestic violence and sexual assault.  In 2013, he received the Voice Award from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at Paramount Studios in Hollywood, CA for his work across the country as a peer/consumer leader.  In 2014, he accepted the Capitol Probe Award at the District of Columbia Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony and in 2015 he received the U.S. Congressional Victims' Rights Caucus Eva Murillo Unsung Hero Award.  Kellibrew credits his grandmother, Delores, for being a model for humanity.  Follow Kellibrew on Facebook.com/willkelli and at www.williamkellibrew.com



Saturday, October 15, 2016

Why I Am Committed to Nonviolence

MLK Faith Is Taking the First Step
Click here for more blog posts from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016

I have blogged a lot about the things that affect me – and I am sure they affect you, too. Like the killings of Black people by the police and other authorities.  And The Calais Jungle.  And the history of the Freedom Riders.  And I have blogged about the fact that Black women cancer patients are often denied the care they need. 

For some of my recent blog posts, see the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016

As I have asked bloggers to submit blogs that are personal, I want to share with you some of my personal thoughts, feelings and experiences.

As I said in Violence Begins at Home, this work begins with the self. We all want other people to change, but in order to achieve that, we first need to change ourselves.

I use many different personal development methods in my work and in my life. The one method that has affected me the most is Nonviolent Communication (NVC). For more about NVC, see 8 Books about NVC and my interviews with NVC authors.

My biggest problem has probably always been my low self-esteem, which I could also characterize as self-hatred. I taught courses in Building Self-Esteem and Confidence for many years.

The way we talk about ourselves, to ourselves, is a central feature in our self-esteem. We use language that undermines our confidence. We use jackal language (blaming, judging labelling) to ourselves, about ourselves. We learn lessons such as feeling “not good enough” very early in life, and in consequence, we put ourselves down. Often, we learn to put ourselves down before someone else has the chance to do it. I have seen this tendency in myself and in many of my students. I am usually unaware of it – it's a tendency that is unconscious.

When I was doing a lot of NVC, I found that my self-talk changed. The way I talked to myself became more positive. I didn't plan for this or expect it, it just happened.

I have agoraphobia, one symptom of which is that I find it difficullt to cross the street. I have to wait until I feel comfortable, until there is not too much traffic, and so forth. I could be giving myself positive, encouraging messages in this context.

But one day, as I was waiting for the lights to change, I heard a voice in my head saying you're so STUPID!!! Over and over again. I was shocked, but I'm sure these are the types of messages I am giving myself all the time. 

This is just an example of the kind of self-talk that undermines our self-esteem and conidence. When we are harsh with ourselves, we tend to be harsh towards others as well. As Marshall Rosenberg explained in Nonviolent Communication, we can use jackal language towards ourselves or towards others.

When we have jackal thoughts towards ourselves, we tend to project these kinds of thoughts and attitudes towards others. This can, and often does, lead to conflict.

When I became kinder in my self-talk, others saw and commented on how different I was in my interactions with others. I wish I had known about NVC when I was teaching.

I am very keen that more and more of us learn NVC. This will transform our our lives, our worplaces and our communities and will, eventually, transform the world. Transformation begins at home.








 

Saturday, October 01, 2016

Black History Blogs

MLK voting 1964
I have posted many Black history posts on this blog and I think it's useful to list them.  So you can find many of them listed below (in no particular order).

Plus click here for some of my African history blog posts.

Please share these with your networks, and particularly with parents, children and young people, and teachers and schools.  Please leave your comments on the individual blog posts.

Please note, I DO NOT distinguish between African history and Black history. Its all the history of African people on the Continent and in the Diaspora. If you are familiar with my work, such as my More Black Success ebooks, you now that all of my work has a global
Slavery by Another Name
African focus. Whether we are in Africa, in the Caribbean, in Europe, in the United States or the Americas – wherever we are, we are African people.

But since I know that some people make a distinction between Black people and African people, and because I know this distinction is important to some people, I have listed them separately. Remember, we are one people, and it is all the history of African people. And remember, too, EVERY MONTH IS BLACK
Josephine Baker
HISTORY MONTH.

Black History Blogs








Aimé Césaire Centennial at the Schomburg




























Please share these with your networks and please leave your comments on the individual posts.  Thanks. 


African History Blogs

Nelson Mandela and Family
I have listed some of my African history blog posts below.

See also:  Black History Blogs.    

Please note, I DO NOT distinguish between Black history and African history, but I have listed them separately because I know that this distinction matters to some people.

When we learn about what has happened, what has been done to people, on the African Continent and in the Diaspora, it is clear that it is all the same story. We are one people. 

Benin bronze
Please share these with your networks, and particularly with parents, children and young people, and teachers and schools.  Please leave your comments on the individual posts

And remember, EVERY MONTH IS BLACK HISTORY MONTH/AFRICAN HERITAGE MONTH.   

African History: Invasion 1897 - this links to some of my other African history blogs 
including blogs about Kenya, Namibia and the Congo..





The Sowetan:  Jumping the Border for Water

Sweet Crude - The Niger Delta




World War One:  The Crucial Battle for Togo 


See also:   Black History Blogs

Please share these with your networks and please leave your comments on the individual posts.  Thanks.

Wednesday, September 07, 2016

The Calais Jungle

The Calais Jungle, London Southbank
I am sure you have heard of the “Jungle”, the name given to the camp in Calais where many refugees have gathered hoping to cross the Channel and enter Britain. A lot of them are African people.

I saw The Calais Jungle, an exhibition at the Royal Festival Hall, London Southbank, on Sunday. It was included in the Africa Utopia festival, which has now ended, and the Love Festival, and continues until 2nd October. If you have not seen it, I recommend you see it.

The exhibition includes loads of photographs of people who live in the Jungle, as well as homes, shops, churches and mosques. The Jungle is a vast complex.

What I really like about this exhibition is that the photographs show people's faces. They are not just a faceless mass of refugees, which is how the current crisis is often reported in the mainstream press.

Part of the Jungle was recently demolished, making many people, including children, homeless. Well over 100 children simply disappeared and the French police, according to what is said in this exhibition, did nothing to try to help them, protect them or investigate their disappearance. The children of the Jungle, who have escaped a war zone and the unimaginable terrors they have witnessed, are afraid of the French police.

There have been loads of stories coming out of the Jungle, and French lorry drivers have taken  action this week because they want their government to close it down. The Jungle's residents have become pawns in a very dangerous game being played between and within France, Britain and other European countries. Many lorry drivers feel under pressure from refugees demanding that drivers allow them to stow away in their vehicles. 

The UK government is reported to be building a wall near Calais to further deter The UK government is reported to be building a wall to further deter migrants from entering Britain.   

These refugees are clearly desperate and my heart goes out to them (not making excuses for any intimidatory behaviour).

It is important that we bear the refugees in mind. I am fortunate to live in London, a place that is relatively stable and peaceful, and I feel helpless to do much for them. The one thing I can do, besides blogging, is publish the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence. Please support the blogging carnival.

Friday, September 02, 2016

Black History Film: Freedom Riders

Bombed Freedom Rides Bus

























Have you ever gone into McDonald's, Burger King, Pizza Hut, KFC or indeed, any fast food place to buy and eat a meal? I am sure at some point we have all patronised some such establishment, or a café or diner.

Have you ever reflected on the fact that there was a time we were not allowed to enter such places?

The documentary Freedom Riders covers a period in 1961 when people – both Black and white – challenged the laws and customs that forbade Black and white people from mixing or co-mingling. The film contains archive footage as well as interviews with some of the original Freedom Riders.

Freedom Riders, a hard-hitting documentary, depicts when members of CORE – the Commission on Racial Equality – embarked on a journey to test a recent ruling by the Supreme Court which had declared segragation on interstate buses to be unconstitutional. They set out to test whether Federal law was being enforced.

The journey began in Washington, D.C. The Freedom Riders boarded buses to Atlanta, GA, where they met with Martin Luther King. They were excited to meet with him and hoped he would join them. But he cautioned them not to continue their quest, and to use methods that were less confrontational.

At this point, I admit to being confused. While applauding their courage, I do not understand why these young people chose to put themselves in extreme danger rather than finding another, less violent way to address the issue.

The Freedom Riders continued on their way, heading towards Birmingham, AL. One group rode a Greyhound bus (coach), the other used Trailways. The Greyhound never made it to its destination - it was firebombed by a racist mob. The Trailways bus arrived in Birmingham to be greeted by another racist mob. Bull Connor, Birmingham's Chief of Police, had made a deal with the Ku Klux Klan to allow the mob to assault the Freedom Riders for 15 minutes before the police arrived.

Because they were confronted by such extreme force, the Freedom Riders resolved to continue on their journey. They refused to be intimidated into giving up. This much I do understand and, again, applaud.

The Freedom Riders were then joined by fresh troops from Fisk University in Nashville, TN. Each had signed his or her last will and testament before joining the Freedom Rides. As time went on, more and more people joined them.

The film documents the dirty deals that were done, such as the one in Birmingham I mentioned above. At one point, the riders were holed up in the First Baptist Church with MLK, who was on the phone to the then Attorney General Bobby Kennedy. The Kennedies had not taken much notice of the need to enforce Federal law forbidding segregation up until then, and as Julian Bond says, civil rights were “an afterthought” to them. But MLK insisted they take action, and the Freedom Riders captured their attention and that of the nation. The leaders got behind the Freedom Riders and their efforts were reported internationally, shaming America and the values our nation was meant to represent. 
 
The actions of the Freedom Riders, and the support of MLK and other prominent leaders such as the Reverend Ralph Abernathy, led to the Riders securing a high level of protection for part of their journey. This demonstrated that the State and Federal governments could have afforded them that protection from the start. This takes me back to my original question. Why did the Riders not insist on getting government protection before they started out? Or why diid they not use less violent strategies?

Unfortunately, the story did not end there. The Riders suffered more brutal racist violence. In Jackson, Miss, they were sentenced to hard labour at the notorious Parchman State Prison. Again, this was intended to discourage them but had the opposite effect. The prison became one of the stops on the Freedom Rides and over 300 of the riders served time there – under a law that had been declared unconstitutional.

I have to admire the Riders' ingenuity. Nothing and no one was going to stop them. They turned every adversity into an advantage. They even composed a song about the Parchman prison. 


The Freedom Riders' quest was a foolhardy one – in terms of the methods they used - and led to a great deal of suffering which, to my mind, was preventable. However, the courage and determination of these young people spurred the Federal Government to take action and, in the end, led President Kennedy to call for an end to all segregation.

The film draws some very uplifting and inspiring conclusions. People from all over the United States, from different races and religions, and different backgrounds, came together and put their lives on the line to put an end to racial injustice.

I definitely recommend you see this film.

Please leave your comments below and please share this with your networks. Thanks.


Tuesday, July 26, 2016

87-Year-Old Venus Green Locks Police Officer in Her Basement ...

This is the kind of news story I like to see.  87-Year-Old Venus Green Locks Police Officer in Her Basement ... and wins a $95,000 settement! 

How's that for some news you can use?

Seems the police officer forced his way into her home on a pretence and sarted pushig her around.  Meanwhile, her grandson, Tallie, had been shot in a convenience store and the police officer was preventing the medics from helping him.

Rather than stand by and allow Tallie to become another statistic, Venus took matters into her own hands and locked the officer in the basement!

This story just keeps getting better.  Green then sued the City of Baltimore and won - they paid her $95,000 compensation . Go Venus!

We MUST put an end to this police violence and intimidation.  Support the Week of Nonviolence and the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.

Click here to read the article on Urban Intellectuals.  .

Please share this with your networks and please leave your comments below.  Thanks.