Ancestral Energies: October 2016

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Youth and Adults Must Work Together to Stop Violence

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Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Organizing for the Week of Nonviolence in Atlanta

William Kellibrew

Click here for more blog posts from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.

The Black Women for Positive Change Atlanta, Georgia Week of Nonviolence focused on bringing awareness to violence prevention. Community members joined together to discuss the impact of violence and identify strategies for supporting a violence-free community.

The goal of the event was to support nonviolence and violence prevention in the Atlanta community.

We held the event at the Adamsville Recreation Center in Atlanta, Georgia. Two moms who have experienced their sons killed, as well as community members, were involved. 12 people attended.

Difficulties we experienced included finding a location, collaborating with local organizations, finding funding, and advertising the event without a huge network.

Having a co-chair was extremely beneficial.

Quality was more important than quantity at this event. Two mothers provided a glimpse into their experiences of losing their sons to violence. The conversation was extremely beneficial and the discussion about violence-prevention provided some relief to attendees and enabled us to look at solutions. It seems like there is commitment to continue next year’s event.

Next year, we will start organizing earlier and utilize social media to share information about the event.

On July 2, 1984, at age 10, William Kellibrew witnessed the murders of his mother, Jacqueline and 12-year-old-brother, Anthony, by his mom’s ex-boyfriend in their family living room. The killer took his own life that day, but not before making William beg for his life at gunpoint. Kellibrew struggled as a child, teen and young adult, but persevered to become a global leader on the issues he faced in his years of struggle including child sexual abuse, witnessing and experiencing violence and homicide as well as a multitude of victimizations and long-lasting effects related to trauma.

Now, a global advocate for human, civil, children and victims’ rights, Kellibrew travels throughout the world sharing his story of courage and resiliency on the pathway to healing and on-going recovery.

In 2011, Kellibrew was recognized by the White House as a ‘Champion of Change’ working to end domestic violence and sexual assault. In 2013, he received the Voice Award from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at Paramount Studios in Hollywood, CA for his work across the country as a peer/consumer leader. In 2014, he accepted the Capitol Probe Award at the District of Columbia Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony and in 2015 he received the U.S. Congressional Victims' Rights Caucus Eva Murillo Unsung Hero Award. Kellibrew credits his grandmother, Delores, for being a model for humanity. Follow Kellibrew on Facebook.com/willkelli and at www.williamkellibrew.com.

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Why I Am Committed to Nonviolence

MLK Faith Is Taking the First Step

Click here for more blog posts from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.

I have blogged a lot about the things that affect me – and I am sure they affect you, too. Like the killings of Black people by the police and other authorities. And The Calais Jungle. And the history of the Freedom Riders. And I have blogged about the fact that Black women cancer patients are often denied the care they need.

For some of my recent blog posts, see the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.

As I have asked bloggers to submit blogs that are personal, I want to share with you some of my personal thoughts, feelings and experiences.

As I said in Violence Begins at Home, this work begins with the self. We all want other people to change, but in order to achieve that, we first need to change ourselves.

I use many different personal development methods in my work and in my life. The one method that has affected me the most is Nonviolent Communication (NVC). For more about NVC, see 8 Books about NVC and my interviews with NVC authors.

My biggest problem has probably always been my low self-esteem, which I could also characterize as self-hatred. I taught courses in Building Self-Esteem and Confidence for many years.

The way we talk about ourselves, to ourselves, is a central feature in our self-esteem. We use language that undermines our confidence. We use jackal language (blaming, judging labelling) to ourselves, about ourselves. We learn lessons such as feeling “not good enough” very early in life, and in consequence, we put ourselves down. Often, we learn to put ourselves down before someone else has the chance to do it. I have seen this tendency in myself and in many of my students. I am usually unaware of it – it's a tendency that is unconscious.

When I was doing a lot of NVC, I found that my self-talk changed. The way I talked to myself became more positive. I didn't plan for this or expect it, it just happened.

I have agoraphobia, one symptom of which is that I find it difficullt to cross the street. I have to wait until I feel comfortable, until there is not too much traffic, and so forth. I could be giving myself positive, encouraging messages in this context.

But one day, as I was waiting for the lights to change, I heard a voice in my head saying you're so STUPID!!! Over and over again. I was shocked, but I'm sure these are the types of messages I am giving myself all the time.

This is just an example of the kind of self-talk that undermines our self-esteem and conidence. When we are harsh with ourselves, we tend to be harsh towards others as well. As Marshall Rosenberg explained in Nonviolent Communication, we can use jackal language towards ourselves or towards others.

When we have jackal thoughts towards ourselves, we tend to project these kinds of thoughts and attitudes towards others. This can, and often does, lead to conflict.

When I became kinder in my self-talk, others saw and commented on how different I was in my interactions with others. I wish I had known about NVC when I was teaching.

I am very keen that more and more of us learn NVC. This will transform our our lives, our worplaces and our communities and will, eventually, transform the world. Transformation begins at home.

Click here for more blogs from the Blogging Carnival for Nonviolence 2016.

Saturday, October 01, 2016

Black History Blogs

MLK voting 1964

I have posted many Black history posts on this blog and I think it's useful to list them. So you can find many of them listed below (in no particular order).

Plus click here for some of my African history blog posts.

Please share these with your networks, and particularly with parents, children and young people, and teachers and schools. Please leave your comments on the individual blog posts.

Please note, I DO NOT distinguish between African history and Black history. Its all the history of African people on the Continent and in the Diaspora. If you are familiar with my work, such as my More Black Success ebooks, you now that all of my work has a global

Slavery by Another Name

African focus. Whether we are in Africa, in the Caribbean, in Europe, in the United States or the Americas – wherever we are, we are African people.

But since I know that some people make a distinction between Black people and African people, and because I know this distinction is important to some people, I have listed them separately. Remember, we are one people, and it is all the history of African people. And remember, too, EVERY MONTH IS BLACK